Tag: lose weight

Looking on the Bright Side

https://www.lifestylesupportguru.com/Hello from the Lifestyle Support Guru! Once again, I am here to share some advice with you to help you make it through the darkening days of autumn. Even the LSG is human and has things that go wrong in her life, just like ordinary people, but there is always a bright side or a silver lining or a redeeming quality or an element of hope or… you get the idea.
1. The Cloud: You have been invited to a birthday party – let’s say your nephew’s 40th – in London but you decide to give it a miss since it may be a bit of a risk to travel there, given the current ‘petrol problem’. If you got stuck ‘darn sarf’, you would have to leave Molly in the cattery until you could get home again, which could cause her untold psychological problems because you told her it would only be for three days – and Molly already has enough psychological problems without adding to them.
The Silver Lining: Now that you’re not going, it doesn’t matter that you didn’t lose the two stone you’d promised yourself you’d do before the party. (Thinking back, two pounds might have been a more realistic goal.)
2. The Cloud: You have a visitor – let’s say a male sibling – who turns up with a streaming cold passed on to him by snotty-nosed kids in school, which means he spends the weekend coughing, sneezing and spluttering, much to the consternation of those around him whenever we go to public places.https://www.lifestylesupportguru.com/
The Silver Lining: It isn’t Covid!
3. The Cloud: The sibling goes back to work, leaving you with an empty house and no one to talk to (note: the sibling sees this as his own personal silver lining rather than a cloud).
The Silver Lining: You can now eat things you like, such as lamb, spinach, cheesy mash or hummus.
Exit left, whistling ‘Always look on the bright side of life…’

Losing weight

Hello, hello, hello! I realise that it has been quite some time since I offered any advice, but life has been its usual hectic, never-ending round of parties and trips abroad.
Actually, when I say ‘parties’, I really mean saying ‘hello’ to one or two people in the local and a Christmas meal with the charity committee from the local.

And when I say ‘abroad’, I really mean York, where I spent Christmas with the unmarried siblings. We had a jolly time, even bumping into the Tiny Tyke (TT) unexpectedly when he bounded up to us like an overexcited puppy in the first pub we visited! And he didn’t spill a drop of his drink as he bounded up to us, which rather impressed us!

Anyway, I digress, since this is about losing weight – but fear not! I have not succumbed to offering advice about the dreaded post-Christmas/New Year diet – no point, because you’ll only have to do it all again next year. No, this is about a medical ‘procedure’, as operations are now called. But fear not! I have not had a gastric band fitted or gone for liposuction (that could create a fatberg all of its own!). This was a ‘female’ procedure, so the boys may want to look away now. But fear not! I shall not be going into the details of the ‘procedure’ – no, no, no! The LSG has far more discretion.


All you need to know is that this required the removal of ‘bits’ which were considered ‘at risk’, although not at any life-threatening level, and I was only in for a day, although it seemed longer, since I had to be at the hospital at 7.30 in the morning, which, for the past seven years, I hadn’t realised existed any more. In addition, I was put last on the list (they obviously didn’t know who I am), which meant that, by the time they eventually got to me, I had answered questions such as ‘Are you wearing any make-up?’ (obvious answer – NO!) and ‘Do you have any body piercings?’ (also NO!), as well as ‘Do you still live at …?’ (answer – I haven’t had the chance to move house in the last eight hours) several times, even within two minutes of each other. I realise the NHS has to be careful, but there are limits…

I survived, despite the surgeon passing me a consent form for the ‘procedure’ and asking me to ‘sign my life away’ – not quite what one wishes to hear from the person who has your life in their hands. She smiled in a rather evil way, I thought, when I said, ‘I hope not!’ – jealousy of the LSG, I believe.

Large glass red wine

When I came round, I felt as if I had drunk several bottles of a strong red wine (Shiraz, perhaps?) without the benefit of going through the enjoyable phase! Youngest sibling came to collect me in the evening – not because he had a deep desire to travel from Hull to spend a Friday evening with the LSG (although many would!), but because next-youngest sibling had to go to a play rehearsal in the evening and it is recommended that you are not left on your own for 24 hours after a ‘procedure’ and Molly-the-all-black-cat was not considered a suitable companion. However, she ended up being my carer anyway, since I sent the two siblings off to the pub. There are limits to how long one can bear looking at the faces of two men who wish they were anywhere rather than sitting watching a woman who’s just had ‘bits’ removed and who don’t want ANY of the details!
I am recovering well – provided I wear elasticated trousers and ‘big’ knickers and don’t cough, sneeze or laugh.

And the weight loss? How much do ovaries weigh?